My Circle of Trust

Throughout my journey of self discovery and self acceptance, I have invested some time in reading books and articles and blogs which help me to understand more fully, from other peoples perspectives, the challenges I am facing.

Recently, I have been reading a book called “A Hidden Wholeness” by Parker J Palmer (Published by Jossey-Bass) which is provoking within me, a thrilling sense of clarity around affirming my approach to dealing with the problems I have carried throughout my adult life.

I wanted to talk in my post today about a concept which is featured called “A Circle of Trust” because the author here, is addressing a fundamental principle in reaching wholeness from within by engaging a community.

He says that first and foremost we should create a space within us to hear the inner teacher. My inner teacher told me that I must accept my gay sexuality even though it at first appeared to me to be in conflict with my catholic faith and my marriage. [It isn’t!]

Secondly, he says that we should invite other people into our journey who can help us to discern our inner teachers voice so that we are supported and strengthened when the search for wholeness gets tough.

This community of support, he calls a “Circle of Trust” and these people held within this community need to be people who are willing to abstain from giving advice and who help those of us seeking our hidden wholeness to distinguish between the inner voice of truth and the inner voice of fear.

I have been fortunate to have the support of a coach who I now recognise as being truly present in my journey of discovery and acceptance in exactly the role described by Parker J Palmer, and this for me has been an amazing, life-changing support which I thank God for everyday.

For a time, I felt frustrated that my wife and my brother could not support me in this unbiased way, but Parker J Palmer has helped me to understand that my expectations for a “Circle of Trust” in the way that he describes it, and the way that I need it, is unrealistic, because they are too close and affected by the choices I discern from my inner voice. They support me in a different way with their love.

So, my post today is saying two important things:-

1/ Create space in your life to be quiet to listen to your inner voice

2/ Read this fantastic book and reach out for objective support, as I have done, to support you in your own “Circle of Trust”

My next blog will be:    The Heart is Slow to Learn

William Defoe

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