During many years of suppressing my sexuality within my marriage, I suffered terribly with feelings of guilt about my unspoken truth and the feelings I had for my own sex.
In the three years since I have explained these feelings to my wonderful wife and been accepted by her, I have struggled again to find a way of living in a faithful and loving marriage whilst continuing to feel attracted to my own sex.
I am beginning to sense that the hard work I have invested in my own development to understand my truth, has enabled me to recognise that although I choose to be faithful in my marriage, I am still entitled to my own thoughts.
I am able to recognise that I am responding to my sense of self, and honoring my truth, in feeling the intense attraction and internalizing it, but also in remaining faithful to my wife with whom I have exchanged my vows that neither of us, at this point in time want to break.
My next blog will be: Borderline Hysteria